


Those Who Are Left Behind

by kiiriminna



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Asexual Relationship, M/M, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-03-17 12:02:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13658589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiiriminna/pseuds/kiiriminna
Summary: Kraglin has some difficulties on dealing with Yondu's passing, and Rocket isn't good with feelings, but he tries. Past Kraglin/Yondu & past (asexual) Rocket/Groot.





	Those Who Are Left Behind

**Author's Note:**

> I planned to post this as 3rd chapter of my previous story I'm Not Drunk Enough for This, but the tone became so different that I decided to post it as its own...

Kraglin held the arrow that had once belonged to Yondu in his hand, looking at it with longing eyes. It still didn't follow his command as it had done to it's previous owner, dancing its deadly yet beautiful ballet in a tune with Yondu's whistling.

He was currently alone in the Milano. Peter had decided that it was time for something he called "crew bonding and relaxing time", and then landed the ship on the planet called Babilonium, which surface was practically covered with a one big amusement park. Groot and Mantis had of course been delighted, and as well was Drax, once they had managed to explain to him that it wasn't the park itself that was amused; Gamora was more hesitant and Rocket seemed little disheartened, but no-one had really protested the idea.

Kraglin had politely declined, which Peter had finally accepted after Kraglin had said that he would spent that time by training his arrow-weaving skills; the human understood that what he really meant by that was, "it's too early, I'm not ready yet". And he'd hated himself for making Peter look so guilty being about to have fun when it was still so little time from Yondu's – from his fathers – death, but there had been nothing he could do to make it better and luckily Gamora seemed to have it under control since she'd took Peter's hand and whispered something to his ear which had made the human grin a bit before they all left.

Sometimes Kraglin felt like the crew thought that Peter's sorrow over Yondu's death was more important than his; and maybe it was fair, because they didn't really know him but loved Peter as if they were members of a one family… But that didn't change the fact that Kraglin had lost Yondu too.

He missed his captain; since no matter what else Yondu had been to him duiring the years – mentor, friend, even lover – first and foremost he'd been his captain, and that he would always be. Not that Peter was making a bad job at leading his crew – which he kind was, sometimes – but… Yondu had been special case.

Sighing, Kraglin sat down on the bench and slipped the arrow back to belt, then reaching his flask to take a shot but finding it empty. He let out a silent curse and was already going to stand up when another bottle was offered to him.

Smirking, he accepted it and took a swing before turning to look at the newcomer. "Thanks, Rocket."

The furry one shrugged and hopped to sit on the bench opposite of his. "Nah, didn't like it, anyways; besides, I took it from humie."

Kraglin grinned. "Of course. But how come you're back already? I thought you went out with the others."

Rocket snorted. "Peter's ideas of having fun aren't always same as mine. I mean, nice vehicles and all, but they had those height limits, you know? And there's only so many times I can sit with Groot in a mini-train and have kids to try and pet me; and their hands are all sticky from cotton candy and ice-cream and I can't even defence myself because people always gets gross if you bite a child!"

Kraglin grimaced; yeah, that couldn't be very fun.

"Soooo… Any process?" Rocket asked, and when Kraglin just stared at him obliviously he clarified, "With the arrow, I mean."

"None whatsoever."

They sat in silence for a while. Kraglin was struggling with himself; in one hand, he really wanted to talk about Yondu with someone, and Rocket was the only option he really had because others hadn't known his captain, and Peter… well, it would have been little odd, as they'd already accomplished; in the other hand, Rocket wasn't very cut-out to deal with anything even resembling of feelings.

"Just spill it out", Rocket said with exasperated voice; "I can practically hear your thinking."

"I miss Yondu", Kraglin blurted out.

Rocket tilted his head. "Don't we all", he said, but in a way that encouraged Kraglin to continue.

"We were together so long", the ex-ravager said. "And I don't mean just together as a lovers, but… I was only teenager when I joined in, and I really admired him from the beginning. He was gruff and sometimes nasty, but he'd good humor and he never punished anyone for no good reason, like some captains do." He smiled wistfully. "I made my best to prove myself to him, to show that he could trust me in everything… and by the time I'd raised in ranks to his second in command and our professional relationship had turned into a tentative friendship, my admiration had grown into a full-blown crush."

"I bet that the following conversation was little awkward", Rocket offered.

Kraglin laughed. "It certainly was, to me at least; Yondu took it pretty coolly. He just said that I shouldn't expect that he would just settle down with me, and once I said that I understood he just… shrugged; and that was pretty much the whole conversation. Few night after that he asked if I would like to join his company for a drink, and it was already a morning when I left his cabinet."

Rocket laughed. "Damn, that was fast!"

Kraglin cracked a timid smile. "After that it became a regular thing. Of course I knew that he was only indulging my childish whims, but… I was thankful."

That earned him a loud snort. "It isn't like I spent that much time with the man, but one thing I know for sure, and that is that Yondu certainly wasn't a guy who did anything just to indulge someone! So either is was the sex or just your company, but there was something for him to gain in your relationship… And because there's plenty of ways to get the previous with no strings attached, I would presume that it was the latter he was looking for."

"You think so?" Kraglin asked, feeling both hopeful and surprised; Rocket clearly was more tactful than he'd gave him a credit for – then again, it would have been hard  _not_  to be.

"I know so", his companion assured. Then he continued, now with little subdue voice, "It's great to have someone around who…  _cares_  about you with no boundaries, even when you think you don't really deserve it, and who you can care about without the constant fear that they'll leave you if you mess things up in any way or just grow inconvenient for them… I mean, that's the reason Groot and I worked up together so well. The older Groot, you know", he then added hastily.

"Oh. Oh – you mean that you two – you were-?" Well, wasn't  _that_  unexpected?

Rocket fidgeted. "Not like that… I mean, there wasn't anything – sexual, understand? Since I never found doing it very interesting, and I'm not sure if he even  _can_ , at least with anyone who isn't the same race. But – yeah. We were together, in as many ways as possible."

Kraglin thought about the child-Groot they were travelling it. "Then – that must feel very strange, doesn't it? To see him as a kid."

Rocket shrugged. "I'm pretty sure that the current Groot isn't the same as my Groot; at least he has no memories of his past life. And yeah, it's still strange, even though I've learned to think him as previous Groot's child more than him itself reborn or something…"

"Doesn't really make it any less painful", Kraglin said quietly, thinking about Peter – Peter, who Yondu had learned to love as his own son, and ended up to sacrifice his life for. "In the end, I still ended up betraying him", he said quietly, "following Taserface's lead…" he fell quiet for a while to give Rocket some time to ease his snickers before continuing, "I – did I even apologize him, properly? So much happened, and I can't remember…"

"He knew", Rocket assured him. "I think he was far more adept with feelings than anyone thought, at least when they weren't his own."

"I was jealous", Kraglin continued, as if he hadn't even listened. "He and Peter… No matter what Peter did, Yondu was always ready to give him a second chance, to make excuses! I thought…"

"…What? That maybe Yondu was planning to change you into a younger model?" When Kraglin said nothing, Rocket sputtered, "You – you actually thought that-?"

"Well, how was I supposed to know?" Kraglin answered, little defiantly.

Rocket actually had balls to giggle.

"It wasn't that funny!"

"It is to me!" Rocket hollered. "And I'm sure that if Yondu, wherever he now might be, could hear that, he would laugh too!" After a while, when he'd managed to control his hilarity, Rocket added, "But seriously… I don't think that he held any ill will towards you in the end… Because, from the moment you came to let us out from that cage, he acted like he'd expected you to do exactly that. Actually, I think that only reason why he tried to make Groot find the key was just because he wasn't sure how long it would take from, you to  _do_  that decision to help us out, not that he ever doubted that you  _would_."

"Is that what you really think?" Kraglin asked.

"Hey, I'm not exactly the sort to tell people fairy tales to ease their worries!" Rocket answered. Then he scratched his head, like he was trying to decide if he was going to say something more or not. "It's… okay to miss him", he finally said. "He was a good man. But… don't let it swallow you, you know? Because, and I talk from experience: people die, good people; people we care about. Heck, sometimes I think that its only us assholes who survive, while those who really deserved to live are the ones who'll die and be forgotten…" There was an empty look in Rocket's eyes; likely he was remembering the older Groot, or maybe some other, long lost comrades. His voice was quiet, and it wasn't clear to Kraglin if he was talking to him anymore, or if Rocket even recalled that the ex-ravager was there in the first place. "But they sacrificed themselves so you could survive, and that's why you need to keep on living, no matter how hollow you sometimes feel yourself – because its my life that gives meaning for their deaths…"

Suddenly he whipped his head around and stared at Kraglin, his eyes wide and startled. Then he yanked the bottle from Kraglin's hands and emptied it with one swig. "…Yuck, disgusting! Hey, you wanna come with me and see if we can find some more of this from Star-Dork's cabinet?" he sounded little squirmish, clearly hoping that Kraglin would follow his lead to change the topic.

Indulging him, Kraglin smiled slightly. "Maybe later. And… Maybe we could then go out and see if there's anything we both would enjoy in that loony house?"

Rocket shrugged. "Yeah, fine… Well, come to find me when you're ready." And then he hurried away, probably wanting to collect his thoughts alone somewhere.

Being also left alone, Kraglin layed down on the bench, arms under his head, and eyes fixed on the ceiling but looking far farther than it, in to the pitch black space that was once lit in color by the Ravagers, given their farewells to the fallen comrade.

"I miss you", he said quietly, "and possibly I never stop missing you. But… I also think that I can live with that and still move on." He thought about Rocket, and his two Groots, one who was his past partner and other who was almost like his son, and smiled a bit. "Even if I'll never completely forget you, given time, I might find new people in my life; new friends… and, someday, maybe even lovers… Because, that's what people do, right?"


End file.
